Disclaimer

If you do not know me (I mean, really know me) then there is something you need to understand before you read this blog: I value the truth above everything else... except a good laugh. A good laugh will almost always beat the truth as far as I’m concerned. Everything you read on this blog will be true, somewhat true, or something I made up in an effort to get a laugh. Sometimes I will go on a rant that I don’t really mean (or only kind of mean). Sometimes I will mean what I write only to completely change my mind a year, month, or day later. Such is life. By reading this blog you agree not to get offended by anything I write (or, at the very least, you agree not to tell me or anyone else that you are offended). It is worth noting that my employer does not endorse my blog (or even read it, to tell you the truth). The Wife also does not endorse my blog (though she will read it from time to time). I am not paid to write this... it’s just my way of giving back to the community. I have, and will, touch on a wide range of subjects and will give my opinion on these subjects. Again, most of what I say is for laughs but every now and then I will say what I really think and feel (see my views on Westboro Baptist Cult). How will you know when I’m serious and when I’m trying to get a laugh? You’ll know. And if you don’t know, well... maybe this isn’t the best thing for you to be reading. So, sit back, read and enjoy. Leave comments if you want and don’t be afraid to publicly follow me.



Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Talkin' Baseball

Let me start by saying a belated “Congrats!” to my good friends who are fans of the Revolutionary War Heroes. As I’m sure you know by now, the Revolutionary War Heroes won their second College World Series in a row. They did it with good pitching, great defense and timely hitting… the way God intended baseball games to be won.

Sticking with baseball, we had an interesting night last night at James Island High School for the first game of the first round playoff series between West Ashley Post 147 and Georgetown Post 114. The night started with me walking up to the press box about 45 minutes before the start of the game. As I walked up the steps, multiple wasps came from under the steps. I didn’t like it, but I made it through. I set up everything and then go to head back down to the field (because we don’t have any A/C up in the press box). First I stuck my head out of the door to see if my flying friends were still there. It looked all clear so I went down the steps and from out of nowhere, they were all around me… but again I made it through unharmed. So I go to talk to my old Legion coach (who is the current GM) and one of the assistant coaches (who played for me and coach with me back when I was coaching). I tell them about the problem under the steps leading up to the press box. They called me names that made me think that perhaps they questioned my toughness. I made it clear that after what I went through a few weeks ago, I wasn’t scared of getting stung by a couple of wasps. Anyway, they didn’t believe that it was as bad as I said it was… so the assistant coach (Brett) comes up there with me. We walk up the steps and… nothing. Not one single wasp. At least, that’s what they wanted us to believe. What they were really doing was setting up an ambush. So as Brett starts to walk back down the steps, a swarm of wasps comes out from under one of the steps. I would like to tell you that I threw myself at Brett knocking him out of harms way… but I didn’t. I screamed a high pitch scream, yelled something like “Oh S***!!! They’re all over you!” and then I dove into the press box, grabbed one of the fans that we had in there and pointed it at the door to try and keep the wasps from coming in after me. After a couple of minutes, I step back outside and look over the rail to where Brett is standing. I would like to tell you that he made it without being stung… but he didn’t. He got stung in the lip… and the neck… and twice on the arm (my guess is that the arm stings came as he was swinging his arm like a wounded bear after the lip and neck stings). This caused Tony (the GM) to think maybe he should go get something for us to spray on the wasps. I think what really made him decide to go was when Jeremy got to the field and said he wasn’t going to work the scoreboard if he had to go through wasps to do it (and everyone knows I’m not smart enough to work the scoreboard that they have at the field now). To shorten up this part of the story, Tony came back with a big can of the most powerful wasp spray that could be found on James Island and Jeremy sprayed the wasps while yelling “Say hello to my little friend!!!!”

The game wasn’t great, but West Ashley won so that’s what matters. I don’t remember blow by blow what happened, but I do remember that Georgetown jumped out to a 3-0 lead. Then a couple innings later it was 4-4. Then Georgetown got a 7-4 lead. Then at some point, West Ashley came up to bat… The first guy up struck out… but got on base because of a wild pitch on the third strike. Before we know it, West Ashley almost batted around… twice. Only one batter didn’t come up twice that inning. Two home runs were hit. One was a grand slam by the clean up hitter on an 0-2 count (causing Jeremy to scream out of the window, “OMG! He’s the clean up hitter and you threw him THAT PITCH on an 0-2 count!? Are you kidding me?!). Ok, he might not have yelled that… but I could tell he wanted to. West Ashley ended up winning 20-8 (or something like that).

I know this is a little off topic, but what the hell is wrong with society? I saw a commercial a while ago for that Kardashians show on E!. (***NOTE: I haven’t seen the show, so this could have been worked out by now… but I still want to talk about it). It seems the mom wanted to change her last name back to Kardashian… right now her last name is Jenner because she is currently married to Bruce (yes, THAT Bruce) Jenner. It seems it’s confusing to some people because her last name is different from 3 of her more famous (for what, I don’t know) daughters. I’m sorry, Bruce Jenner needs to step up and say, “Do you know who I am?!” I mean, here’s a guy who has actually done something in his life (Gold medal in the Decathlon at the ’76 Summer Olympics… setting a world record). He also spoke at Stiles Point when I was a student there (I want to say I was in the first grade… maybe second grade). What the hell did anyone else in this family do (aside from the late Mr. Kardashian who defended OJ… that’s something to be proud of)?

Know Your Medal of Honor Recipients:

Seaman John M. Burns (US Navy) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on August 5, 1864 on board the USS Lackawanna. His citation reads:

On board the U.S.S. Lackawanna during successful attacks against Fort Morgan, rebel gunboats and the ram Tennessee in Mobile Bay, on 5 August 1864. Although severely wounded and sent below under the surgeon's charge, Burns promptly returned to his station and assisted the powder division throughout the prolonged action which resulted in the capture of the rebel ram Tennessee and in the damaging and destruction of Fort Morgan.

First Sergeant Elmer J. Burr (US Army) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on December 24, 1942 at Buna, New Guinea. His citation reads:

For conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity in action above and beyond the call of duty. During an attack near Buna, New Guinea, on 24 December 1942, 1st Sgt. Burr saw an enemy grenade strike near his company commander. Instantly and with heroic self-sacrifice he threw himself upon it, smothering the explosion with his body. 1st Sgt. Burr thus gave his life in saving that of his commander.

Staff Sergeant Herbert H. Burr (US Army) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on March 19, 1945 near Dorrmoschel, Germany. His citation reads:

He displayed conspicuous gallantry during action when the tank in which he was bow gunner was hit by an enemy rocket, which severely wounded the platoon sergeant and forced the remainder of the crew to abandon the vehicle. Deafened, but otherwise unhurt, S/Sgt. Burr immediately climbed into the driver's seat and continued on the mission of entering the town to reconnoiter road conditions. As he rounded a turn he encountered an 88-mm. antitank gun at pointblank range. Realizing that he had no crew, no one to man the tank's guns, he heroically chose to disregard his personal safety in a direct charge on the German weapon. At considerable speed he headed straight for the loaded gun, which was fully manned by enemy troops who had only to pull the lanyard to send a shell into his vehicle. So unexpected and daring was his assault that he was able to drive his tank completely over the gun, demolishing it and causing its crew to flee in confusion. He then skillfully sideswiped a large truck, overturned it, and wheeling his lumbering vehicle, returned to his company. When medical personnel who had been summoned to treat the wounded sergeant could not locate him, the valiant soldier ran through a hail of sniper fire to direct them to his stricken comrade. The bold, fearless determination of S/Sgt. Burr, his skill and courageous devotion to duty, resulted in the completion of his mission in the face of seemingly impossible odds.

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