Disclaimer

If you do not know me (I mean, really know me) then there is something you need to understand before you read this blog: I value the truth above everything else... except a good laugh. A good laugh will almost always beat the truth as far as I’m concerned. Everything you read on this blog will be true, somewhat true, or something I made up in an effort to get a laugh. Sometimes I will go on a rant that I don’t really mean (or only kind of mean). Sometimes I will mean what I write only to completely change my mind a year, month, or day later. Such is life. By reading this blog you agree not to get offended by anything I write (or, at the very least, you agree not to tell me or anyone else that you are offended). It is worth noting that my employer does not endorse my blog (or even read it, to tell you the truth). The Wife also does not endorse my blog (though she will read it from time to time). I am not paid to write this... it’s just my way of giving back to the community. I have, and will, touch on a wide range of subjects and will give my opinion on these subjects. Again, most of what I say is for laughs but every now and then I will say what I really think and feel (see my views on Westboro Baptist Cult). How will you know when I’m serious and when I’m trying to get a laugh? You’ll know. And if you don’t know, well... maybe this isn’t the best thing for you to be reading. So, sit back, read and enjoy. Leave comments if you want and don’t be afraid to publicly follow me.



Tuesday, November 9, 2010

My Weekend

As you know, I spent my weekend on a lake in Georgia relaxing and enjoying a nice mini-vacation. HA! Not really. I was at the lake house owned by my parents (Dad and Mom) and their cousins (Jim and Deeny). I have been to this lake house 3 times (twice to work and once for Easter). You see a nice big lake house, I see work. Though I must say this round of work wasn’t nearly as bad as the last round. Let me briefly list some of the people who were there this time (along with one person who wasn’t). Just assume that all of these people are either my parents, cousins, siblings, cousins of cousins, friends of cousins, or Mexicans who left Arizona and went to Georgia after reading about my last adventure working at the lake house. Anyway working on the outside of the house it was me, Dad, Jim, Shannon, John, Brian (or Bryan... or Bhryan with a silent ‘h’... I’m not real sure how he spells his name, but I’m going to stick with ‘Brian’), along with some guests appearances from Troy and Scott (Sonny wasn’t there). On the inside was Mom, Deeny, Debra, Mary Beth, Doubting Teri, Nikki, and others who I’m sure I’m forgetting but (no offense) this blog is about me, not them.

So, the main project for the weekend was to tear off a section of the second floor roof and add a porch. This involved going on to the second floor roof. I know what you’re thinking... Greg, you have a policy against going on roofs. That’s true, but this was different for three reasons: 1. The roof wasn’t steep; 2. There is a 3rd floor porch (so it didn’t feel that high up; and C. There was a door leading out to the area we were working on (so I didn’t have to climb up a ladder... though some/all of the other guys did climb up the ladder to get up there, but you know what? I didn’t. The ladder clearly stated that you should not sit, stand, or climb on or above a specific step and all of them broke that rule...). Anyway, I didn’t plan on working up on the roof, but once I got out there I was having too much fun to not work up there. Call me old fashioned, but I think drinking beer with family while using power tools to tear up a roof is fun. And dadgummit, I didn’t want to miss out on that kind of fun. It didn’t take long for the “Jim transforms into Tom Sawyer” event of the weekend to happen. Once he got us up there and showed us how much fun it could be, he disappeared with Dad and went to get wood for the porch. Mind you, this weekend didn’t come up as a surprise... they knew it was coming and yet they “had” to go to the store at that exact moment... and it “had” to take them about 3 hours (I might be a little off here... I wasn’t really paying attention to the time). Anyway, they got back in time for use to start working on adding the porch. This was started on Saturday but we had to stop for a side project that I could tell you about but I might save that for another day.

Let me pause here to mention a cultural difference that came up when we sat down to eat Saturday night. It seems that what we in South Carolina call hash is called stew in Georgia (and is eaten from a bowl without rice). As you know, I’ve always believed that when in Rome, do as the Romans (which is why I drank PBR and ate beef jerky while floating down the Mighty Edisto this past Summer). So I grabbed a bowl and ate this fine homemade “stew” without rice or complaint. Doubting Teri had more trouble “adapting”. She comes from the line of thought that says when in Rome, tell the Romans they need rice with their hash. Luckily I was there to calm her down and keep her from “making a scene”. Oh, it was also over a meal that my cousin Debra said she finds it hard to take me seriously because when I talk all she can think about is me running around on family vacations long ago with a water gun. I bring this up because everyone else at the table had trouble taking me seriously simply because they know me... Debra was the only one to have a specific reason. Now, back to the work...

The bulk of the work on Sunday was done building the porch. Now might be a good time to point out that when it comes to tearing something down, I’m able to be a lot more “hands on” than when it comes to building something. I’m what they in the construction business call “unskilled labor”. I’m like a mule... I can carry stuff around but can’t do much else (though some of the guys there thought I was more like a donkey... but I digress). So Sunday I spent most of my time helping Shannon cut the wood we were using and then handing it to the guys on the roof who were building the porch. By helping, I mean standing there holding the wood while he cut it and pointing out important things like, “Hey, this wood has a warning stamped on it that says is could cause dust and that the dust could cause cancer according to people in California” which of course drew a hearty laugh from the both of us as we laughed at how stupid people in California are. Anyway, Sunday brought some more laughs as we worked. The measurements we... er, Shannon, used when cutting the wood came from Jim. This was a rather humorous process that involved Jim standing on the roof holding (and from time to time, using) a tape measure and then yelling down numbers to Shannon. The scene reminded me of Peyton Manning standing at the line of scrimmage yelling out all types of stuff and only some of it means anything. Shannon, through years of experience (and probably some luck) was able to pick out the correct numbers from Jim and use those to cut the wood. Of course, sometimes things were a little off which led to the guys on the roof having to make some adjustments. Our motto was simple... Measure once, cut twice (or thrice). Many people think this is wrong, but the fact is it’s more fun to use a power tool than it is to use a tape measure. We also had another motto: Everything is temporary. You see, to work with Jim is to realize that the only constant is change. The same could be said for Dad. Neither man can own a house and leave it the way it is. Some men see a huge lake house and say why change it. Dad and Jim dream of a ton of work that can be done to the huge lake house and say why not. So this leads us to another motto: It’s good enough. You see, perfect is great... but good enough costs the same amount in rent as perfect. And really, good enough is just how it sounds... good enough to hold up and keep people from falling off (and trust me, we had enough weight up there to make sure it could hold up under anything). So why spend all this time trying to make things “perfect” when there is a good chance it will be changed a year or two from now. We did have some other funny moments when Brian looked at Jim and said the “L” word (as in, “Is that legal?”) and the “P” word (as in, “Do you have a permit to do this?”). Haha... that Brian really had us rolling out there.

Well, I think I’ve said enough on here to keep me from being asked to visit the lake house for a non-work weekend. Before I go, let me say I am happy to report that the dock is still standing, the fence is still up, and the pool still doesn’t leak. And I did have fun. I only wish The Wife had been able to make it. It would have been nice for her to see that some people can go a whole weekend eating nothing but home cooked meals. That’s it... NOW I’ve said enough. :) Oh, I have some pictures to share. One is of me helping Shannon and the other is of the new porch (not 100% done, but close).




Before we get to my football prediction results, I want to touch on an important subject for me. That is the subject of homework. I don’t believe in it. I find it morally, ethically, spiritually, and fundamentally wrong. Leah (Doubting Teri’s oldest child) had to spend time over the weekend working on homework. That’s just wrong. I don’t go into her classroom to spend time with her... I don’t think her teachers should give her work that interferes with her spending time with me. As a youth, I felt very strongly about the evils of homework and did my best to avoid it throughout all my years of schooling. Leah, of course, is different from Uncle Greg in that she is a good student. So she did her homework. But I’m still of the belief that homework is the Devil’s work. I believe the saying is, “A book bag full of homework is the Devil’s playground” (or something like that).

The I’m just sayin... Football Predictions Results

Friday Night
James Island vs. West Ashley – I picked JI and I was right. The Trojans won 30-13.

Summerville vs. Colleton County – I picked Summerville and I was right. The Green Wave won 49-14.

Ashley Ridge at Fort Dorchester – I picked Ashley Ridge and I was wrong. Ashley Ridge lost 33-40.

Dorman at Woodmont – I picked Dorman and I was right. The Doormat... er, Cavilers won 47-0.

Saturday
#18 USC vs. #17 Arkansas – I picked The Revolutionary War Heroes and I was wrong. USC lost 20-41. Sometime in the 4th quarter the announcer (forgot who it was) said you could give a bottle of water to all the remaining fans in the stadium and you wouldn’t have enough water to put out a fire. Not sure how long he’s been waiting to use that line, but it was funny. Come on Revolutionary War Heroes fans... you can do better than that.

Clemson vs. #23 NC State – I didn’t get to see this game, so I don’t know if anything funny was said. I do know I picked the Tigers to lose and I was wrong. Clemson won 14-13.

Navy at East Carolina – I picked Navy and boy was I right. Navy won 76-35.

CSU at Kentucky – I picked Kentucky and I was right. Kentucky won 49-21.

Sunday
Miami at Baltimore – It seems my theory has been proven wrong. I picked The Dolphins to win and I was wrong. Miami lost 10-26.

Monday
Pittsburgh at Cincinnati – I picked the Steelers and I was right. Pittsburgh won 27-21.

Know Your Medal of Honor Recipients:

Second Class Fireman Edward Barrett (US Navy) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on September 14, 1881 while on board the USS Alaska. His citation reads:

On board the U.S.S. Alaska at Callao Bay, Peru, 14 September 1881. Following the rupture of the stop-valve chamber, Barrett courageously hauled the fires from under the boiler of that vessel.

First Sergeant Richard Barrett (US Army) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on May 23, 1872 at Sycamore Canyon, Arizona. His citation reads:

Conspicuous gallantry in a charge upon the Tonto Apaches.

Corporal Jesse T. Barrick (US Army) received his Medal of Honor for his actions from May 26 – June 2, 1863 near Duck River, Tennessee. His citation reads:

While on a scout captured single-handed 2 desperate Confederate guerrilla officers who were together and well armed at the time.

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